October 23, 2011

The second longest five seconds of my life.

NOTE: Yet again, photos have been flipped sideways. Still no idea why.

Amelia's been crawling for a few weeks now, and being the energetic little girl she is, wants to be in everything. Or on everything. Or OFF everything. Like the bed. She likes crawling towards the side of the bed and grabbing things off the bedside table. Usually I'll grab her, either by the clothes or the leg, them haul her back over to me.

Last night, I wasn't as on the ball as usual. I grabbed for her as I saw her approach the side, but she was further away than I thought and tumbled off as I reached. And there was silence. That silence held a lot for me.

Broken neck.

Another funeral.

Guilt.

Jail time for negligence.

Another funeral.

Everyone hating me for the rest of my life for killing my daughter, not protecting her.

Needless to say, she's fine. She was silent from shock, but made up for it very quickly by screaming and promptly losing her breath. I scooped her up before I even knew she was okay, held her close as she screamed and screamed. By the looks of it now, it was more shock and fear that caused the crying. She has a lovely bump on her head (on top of one she got earlier by headbutting a chair!) and a small scratch from something she must've hit on the way down, but she stopped crying rather quickly and started shooting me big grins instead. Though when I tried to take photos she shot me foul "YOU DID THIS TO ME!" looks...

..then fell asleep because she'd had a long day and should've been sleeping anyway instead of flinging herself off the bed.

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