November 27, 2010

Small? I forgot!

Sometimes I forget just how small Ianto was. I'll be looking at photos, and just stare at how tiny our "big little guy" really is in them. I know why. It's because most of the photos we have of him are close up so there's nothing around him to compare to. The one that always surprises me is the one of his first bath. He just looks so different and small in that one compared to the rest. It's the only one we have where he's naked, no clothes or blankets on him. And he just looks so small.

I'm in the process of making a video with Ianto's photos set to music. I tried uploading a version to YouTube, but they blocked the audio. Those pesky copyright laws! *blush* Yeah, I didn't think of that. I'm a twit. Here's one draft of it, anyway:

Any feedback?


  1. Oh Teni, that is such a beautiful tribute. Little Ianto is just so gorgeous xoxoxoxo

  2. Oh Teni, I am in tears. What a beautiful tribute to a beautiful boy. He deserved so much more.


  4. Been where you were darling, I lost two, one at 17 and the other at 22 weeks, both were born alive and both lived a few short hours but there was no chance of survival with mine. I hope life is being kind to you now. I love the name you gave him and I hope you find it in your heart to have more and try again. And know it was nothing you did to cause this, often there is no reason. There was none with either of mine. Hope is there though. I have two sons, one before that, one after. SO take heart. Your memories will always be with you.

  5. Jasmine SquireMay 11, 2013 12:37 pm

    I have never cried so much over something on the internet. Ianto is just a month and half older than my son. I can't imagine going through what you two strong parents have been through. My brain thinks about my birth experience and I think about what if I had been put through this as well? I've been crying for the last twenty minutes over your words, and pictures, and this video. I found my head saying "No, he can't breathe in there" while the coffin was being screwed on. I am just at a loss for words, and I am SO very very sorry for your loss. I've not seen a rainbow in a long time, and i saw one tonight, then found out about your symbolism. <3 I believe it WAS him. You guys are in my thoughts.


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