So, I got through yesterday with minimal tears. Actually, the point at which I cried the most was when I got a bit angry at my brother and Scott (understatement of the year - I was furious) for loading the balloons into the boot of the car!
The day started okay. I went to the party shop to get the helium and balloons, and promptly panicked when I realised I couldn't afford them. Luckily my darling mum came down and paid for me (yaay!)
I got 16 white and 16 light blue balloons - in total, 32, for each week of his life inside me - and a foil one that I wanted to attach to his grave.
|This is the foil one a few hours later, once I had it attached.|
Once we had those home, mum and I went to the cemetery to have lunch with him and scope out where we might like to release the balloons. The wind was blowing towards the head of his grave, so we decided on this little clearing nearby that would ensure the balloons would drift over the grave before heading up into the sky. The clouds were a bit ominous:
but I wasn't too worried. So long as the rain held off until we were done, I was alright.
Once mum and I finished lunch, we went back home/to her place and I started filling the balloons. I really wish I'd gotten photos of the process, but all I have is a few after all the balloons were done and were waiting for the streamers (not ribbon, that's not good for the environment!) to be attached...
|You'll notice some of them aren't floating like they should be. My fault. I didn't fill a couple of them as much as I should have (they were my first few and I didn't want them to pop)|
|Mum's gonna kill me if she sees this photo!|
I went and had a 10-minute nap after that, and found out what happens when I sleep - people stuff up my plans. The balloons were meant to be going in the back seat of the car, to make sure we could get them out easily with minimal tangles. But while I slept, the decision was made to put them into the boot instead. Grrr... When I was woken up, I cracked it with everyone. I was grump all the way to the cemetery, which made me even more upset as I was "meant" to be sad, not angry.
Once we got to the cemetery, I stood back while the boys struggled to get the balloons out of the car. Then I realised that I hadn;t thought of how we were going to release them. What do you say? Scott made the (silly, in my opinion) suggestion that he read a bit of the funeral service out as we let go. My brothers stood there like someone had slapped them. Eventually I came up with "well, why don't we all say something we want to say to him?" - which no-one did. So then it was "Okay, count of three, we all say his name and let go." The wind was blowing in the opposite direction than it was when mum and I had been there earlier, but we stood in the clearing anyway, and prepared to let go.
|Go! Uh... Ianto!!!|
|The streamers didn't want to let go just yet.|
|The balloons were heading towards the tearooms, where a heap of people were having lunch after a funeral of their own. I hope they saw the balloons and liked them.|
|I was sad to see the balloons go, but they just looked so beautiful, I had to smile.|
|Not all the balloons wanted to head into the sky. Some skimmed the ground for a little while...|
|Others went to visit other graves...|
|And this little one skirted around the clearing a bit.|
But after tearing the streamers off them (they were a little wet and weighing the balloons down) we got them flying again. The wind was starting to pick up again, so the balloons we could still see were swirling around. It looked amazing. I attached the foil balloon to the rainbow flag we have on his grave, took a few more photos of the area...
...and we set off. Just as we all got into the car, the heavens opened and it started bucketing down with rain.
All in all, yesterday was an okay day. Sure, last night I almost burned down our new place while cooking, but aside from that, it was okay!